The Brexit Bus

 So what’s the panic? What’s the fuss?
It’s all aboard the big red bus.
The brakes are shot but we don’t care
we’re heading off to God knows where.
The youngsters hover, hesitate
while pensioners decide their fate.
Some changed their minds and some are dead
but buckle up - full steam ahead.

Who ever could have prophesied
that we’d get taken for this ride?
The gloves were off, the rules were bent
and who knows how much cash was spent?
Jo Cox is dead, but this campaign
will stop for nothing – it’s insane.
The xenophobes want aliens out
so spread the hatred, stir the doubt.
The wards aren’t staffed, the fruit’s not picked
but at least they got migration licked.
It’s not far now, the cliff’s in sight;
we can’t slow down, so hold on tight.

It’s natural there’s teething pain –
some short-term loss for long-term gain -
so you might get these gloomy thoughts
of tailbacks at the channel ports,
stockpiling medicine, food stacked high.
bureaucracies that multiply
while business tries to look ahead:
the windscreen’s misted, lights are red.
The Irish border’s still not done;
replay the Troubles, anyone?
In/Out, they said. A toss-up bet;
who knew how complex this would get?

We’re heading for the cliff at speed
so now a driver’s all we need.
We watch, in growing disbelief
negotiations come to grief.
They’re making threats, they’re acting tough;
they work through bombast, bluster, bluff.
The EU watch our drama class
perform their never-ending farce.
While they make V signs from the back
the bus accelerates off track.

What we were offered, it would seem,
was not a route map, but a dream.
“I’ve heard the British people’s voice”
says May, “and I respect their choice.”
That dark campaign, confused at best,
meant voting motives can’t be guessed
but somehow she can read our minds
and what she sees are thick red lines.

Some Tories try to vote her out.
Don’t have the numbers. It’s a rout.
She tries to get her deal through –
loses by hundreds, not a clue.
“Resign” the opposition cried
so then her troops were back on side.  
She says she’s learnt. A range of views.
She will consult and then she’ll choose
but the only members she can see
are Tories and the DUP.
No motion in the house is passed.
Is constipation here to last?
May seems to be in trouble when  
“Let’s all go back and start again.”
She plans to renegotiate.
The EU? Well, they just can’t wait.

The clock is ticking, steering’s gone
but still the bus is thundering on.
there’s flashing lights and danger signs
but keep between those thick red lines
until we face the final drop -
can nothing make this madness stop?
It’s hell on wheels, it’s rock and roll
so tell me – who took back control?